THE EGGPLANTS ARE WATCHING YOU

I love the Eggplant Wizard SO MUCH. Also, too bad angels don't have any junk. Poor Pit.

Very Tiny Paintings

I found a small hill of Candyland cards in one of my boxes of random potential art supplies, and having no idea what they were originally for, decided to make them into little paintings. PETER, I NEED YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP WITH YOUR TRAGIC IRONY EMO RESPONSIBILITY BULLSHIT FOR TWO SECONDS OR I AM GOING TO THROTTLE YOU WITH YOUR OWN TIGHTS. I imagine at some point, that had to have been all MJ could think whenever Petey started in about ol Uncle Ben.  

 

 

You want monster head? I have many kinds!

 

 If there's one thing I hate, it's shirts on girls.

Small Paintings for sale!

Equal parts trying to goad myself into making things and trying not to have even more shit pile up in my house, I've decided to start selling stuff again!
My etsy store has the full list, and here's a few recent ones.

And This, Again
3x3" canvas

Ohhh, I See
3x3" canvas

Slimer Says Boo!
Sold!

Alright, OK
3x3" canvas


No, and No.
Sold!

Oh shit, forgot some!

Watson's legs were definitely better than mine-you will not catch me dragging after my leggy-ass bff over 6 miles of goddamn pasture just for funsies. 

I just forgot to post these last time.

THAT'S RIGHT, MORE SHERLOCK HOLMES BITCHES

I think this is the first time one of my nerdy loves has suddenly become popular, and I have to admit, I'm excited about Holmes having a gonzo internet fandom. I've already read a zillion official pastiches & essays, and frankly, some (many) of them are just LJ fanfic that found a publisher, so I don't understand some of the snooty old fan hate going on. CAN'T WE ALL JUST HUG IT OUT AND MAKE MACROS TOGETHER???

It always kind of nagged at me that most of L's screaming legions of fangirls didn't realize that his hot quirky little habits were lifted bodily from Holmes. Still, I was on board with Death Note up until the fall of L and rise of Near. At least the sloppy retcon that was Holmes' return could be blamed on ACD NOT EVEN WANTING TO WRITE THESE STUPID STORIES YOU GUIZ.

I question the length of his right arm in this drawing. Also, get your fucking feet off the furniture man!

I actually found a preliminary sketch to the SH is Wearing No Pants drawing. Meaning I felt this concept was important enough to merit a practice run to work out all the issues likely to arise when drawing S.H. sans pants.

I love when Watson drags Holmes to the country to not do coke and run around getting in fights 24/7, but Holmes is like OOH I SMELL MYSTERIES. Poor Watson. You fought the good fight, buddy.

The '09 movie made me like Watson much more. I much prefer him sassy to starry-eyed with scattered nagging. Also, let's be honest, he is kinda dingy in the books. I feel pretty confident saying I'm the only nerd who discovered House while browsing the related works section of the Holmes Wikipedia page. I immediately emailed one of my friends asking if she'd seen this show, to which she replied with Hugh Laurie on the cover of Esquire and posed the excellent question, 'where the fuck have you been, they just finished season 3." Speaking of Watson, and things that have been niggling at me for years, I always wondered if some of Wilson's mannerisms were based on David Burke's Watson. Or maybe it's just that there's only so many ways to look constantly exasperated with your BFF.

Speaking of embarassing fanart...

I could never get super-interested in Evangelion, I admit. What I do love about it are all the awesome fuck-yous to the fans, starting with the ending of the original series. If was in charge of a show people were taking waaaaay to seriously, I'd explode everyone, too.



I've kind of read about the new series, and it looks like everything else Gainax has done in the last decade. To wit; HERE'S SOME UNDERAGE BOOBS AND AREN'T THEY JUST ZANY.

I drew this in 2002 or 3...I think I felt like learning to ink or something, got about halfway through and went back to just accepting that particular inability, which is still the case today.

Embarassing Fanart

Yami No Matsuei is solid terrible fangirl fanservice pretty much nonstop, but oooohhhhh, I watched it. I tried to read it, but the artwork is so hideously flowery and sparkly I just couldn't hang.

One thing about this series that IS totally awesome is that the main villain dude was keeping his brother's severed head floating around in a big jar, so that one day he can bring his brother back to life, and then kill him. That's the best needlessly complex utterly pointless plan ever.

Liking Carmen Sandiego isn't that embarrassing; everybody played it in grade school, and who doesn't love Rockapella's stirring rendition of the game show theme? Butttt...I've never actually played the game. I'd always just kind of appreciated it in theory. In my defense, I am utterly weak against the gentleman thief/outlaw detective archetype. I HEART THEM ALL.

And oh yes, I watched the fairly terrible Saturday morning cartoon.

I think ReBoot was pretty decent for what it was and when it was made. Hex holds up as a quality villain, for instance. At least she did, until the whole series went completely batshit early in season 4. Still though, I've driven through Kitsilano and felt a nerdy little thrill over it. Nar.

Growing up with Great Danes, I sort of feel like I have to love Scooby Doo. It was a pretty terrible show, though, let's not kid ourselves.

Kimi Wa Pet (Tramps Like Us in the US, for some reason) is actually pretty good, and I still like it. But it's a cutesty romantic comedy, which is a weird thing for me to be enjoying.

Sherlock Holmes & the Mystery of the Missing Pants

I admit to having huge Sherlock Homes boners, huge nerdy literary boners, since high school. And now, ten years later, it's finally cool! How bout that.

Despite being played by a succession of increasingly old dudes over the last 100-odd years, Holmes was only like 27 at the start of the books. He was just kinda farting around Uni, dividing his time between beating up corpses and hanging out in his room listening to The Cure for days on end.

It's never really resolved if he was actually going to school or just sneaking in at night to fondle beakers and cackle maniacally, since he never actually goes back to the place once he starts shacking up with Watson. PERHAPS HE BECAME INTERSTED IN CHEMISTRY OF ANOTHER SORT, HAR HAR HAR GEDDIT.

Holmes. Holmes, this is. This is an eyeball, Holmes.
This is and eyeball and it is IN MY WATERGLASS, HOLMES. WHY IS THERE AN EYEBALL IN MY WATERGLASS HOLMES???

The most important element of Watson: an air of sorely-tried patience.


So much sweet action going on juuuuuust offscreen in the books.


From a 2007 sketchbook...why is Watson never thin as a lath & brown as a nut in any of the adaptations?
HE'S SUPPOSED BE, DAMNIT.

This was in my 2007 folder...and clearly titled 'Sherlock Holmes is Wearing No Pants', which he clearly is..n't, but I have zero recollection of drawing it, and even less idea why. Sooo enjoy, I guess.

Moooooooar Jungle Book

Since I tend to fixate, here's some quickie Jungle Book watercolor sketches I did after finishing the painting.

Red Dog is my favorite Mowgli story. It's got all the major players, an exciting new enemy, and shows off what a cunning little creature Mowgli has grown up to be. And contains my favorite line in all the stories:

"Howl dogs! A Wolf has died to-night!"

But of all the Pack of two hundred fighting dholes, whose boast was that all Jungles were their Jungle, and that no living thing could stand before them, not one returned to the Dekkan to carry that word.

Akela was pretty unquestionable rad. He knew more about men than anyone, led the Pack for better than a decade, and offered to let his mutinous pack kill him without a fight in exchange for Mowgli's freedom. He kept kicking ass up till his excellent death fighting the dhole. Rock on Akela.

Mang The Bat, who didn't actually do anything in the books, but was mentioned in the Night-Song in the Jungle, which is good enough for me.

And OF COURSE Bagheera, whom I love, because he is a cocky prick, which I suppose comes of being born among men. Plus, it makes his love for Mowgli that much more AWWWWW.

Brothers, That was a Dog's Death

Growing up I read a lot of Victorian-era & earlier lit. Most likely because books in the public domain and my parents both turned up a lot at garage sales. At any rate, the Mowgli stories are one of my favorite things ever, ever. I've read each one at least a hundred times-whenever I imagine what it must be like to be juuuuuust about to shuffle off the mortal coil, the thought that someday, I'll have read The Jungle Books for the last time always comes to my mind.

Looking at the sketch, I feel like this painting was supposed to be a lot more lowbrow than it actually turned out. Also, Shere Kahn is meant to be sort of a cross between a skinned hide and actual tiger, but he ended up looking like he was just chilling out on Mowgli's head.

Not sure why I do such detailed sketches when I'm clearly gonna ignore them as soon as I grab a brush.

CAN'T SLEEP. MUST PAINT.

Finally done. I forgot how long it takes me to paint stuff. I ALSO forgot to scan it before sealing it, so I couldn't get a great shot of it due to reflections and so on. Win some, lose some, I guess; it has been a long time since I painted.

Bubbin' & Bobblin'

Custom Bukka (the hot new vinyl shit, I guess? I basically just paint whatever I'm given and don't ask questions) for the Custom Bukka show at Monkeyhouse Silverlake! This one was one of my best procrastination efforts ever-I had this thing sitting on my desk for 3 months, and managed not to touch it until a week & a half before the deadline. Score!

Couple of coats of paint to start off, so I can actually see what's going on.


I'm not so into the duckbill or the bunny tail, so covering that up. Aaand, since this makes the dude look a little dragony, let's go with that. NAR.

At this point I realize he kinda looks like the Bubble Bobble dragon dude, so going with that now. Someday, I'd like to be able to plan ahead and know what I'm making before it's finished.


But for now, I'll just work on perfecting the stream-of-consciousness custom making.

It's a little hard to see, but he's got a black eye. I guess the little dude he caught put up a good fight. Also, his nose really looks like a wang from this angle. Huh.

It's probably rough being Link

Aside from being doomed to save the same dumb princess and the same dumb kingdom every two weeks for the rest of eternity, it seems like poor Link suffers a pretty high number of minor indignities from townsfolk and monsters, to boot.

You STILL haven't finished my potion? HOW MUCH LATER DO I HAVE TO COME BACK???

Watch where you grab, watch where you grab!

2006 Fanart, or: Behind the Times as Usual

I really like fanart, even though I don't do a ton of it myself. The problem I have is that I'm always either 3 or 4 years behind the general public, oooooor drawing things from any random number of years past.

You know when the boys are out busting, Janine and Slimer totally get it on.

Am I the only person on earth who's read or watched Cybersix? I realize it was only on for like 2 weeks, but come on, it was rad. Cross-deressing main character lady, 6 year old evil Nazi bad guy, long-lost brother trapped in the body of a panther. You know, entertainment. Plus, the animation was amazing. Somehow an Argentinian comic got greenlighted for movie-quality animation. I feel like that would never happen now a days and it's a huge fucking shame. I was always a fan of Cleo from the Heathcliff show. Living in a sweet Caddy, wearing those hot legwarmers, dating an obvious pimp, what a life!

I think Death Note had the fastest crash landing of anything I've ever read. It went from impressively original and interesting to complete idiot 16 yr old girl fanservice disaster in one page. Oh well.